My Journey Is Like A Huge Playground!

So, it has been a while since my last update. Sorry. I have been busy. Yesterday was my 21st birthday. It was a ton of fun, and I can only remember bits a pieces of it. I do remember at 3am going and getting the biggest slice of pizza I have ever seen in my entire life and thinking "What pizza place is open this late?" lol. It was delicious! Although not entirely on plan, if I say so myself.

This week I have lost 2.5 pounds!!! I am finally going back down. Even though Sabrina won this weeks challenge, we both lost, and that is the whole point of this! I did eat pizza at 3am and weighed in at 10am, so I think it is still with me, and next weeks weigh in will be a bigger loss. I am looking at weight loss as a game now. This "Racing Our Shadows" I am doing with Sabrina is making it so much fun, and I love how many views we get!

I have come to the realization that weight loss isn't about how fast you get there. It's about changing your life forever. I want to have a healthy pregnancy, and if I am over weight, the chances are less of having a healthy baby. But, this is my life now. I am who I am, and even if I am changing I have to love who I am now. Because, if I wake up every morning hating myself, it's going to take even longer to lose the weight. Documenting myself on youtube was the best decision I have ever made, besides marrying my husband. I love to film and edit videos, and to do something I love with something I hate, makes me begin to love the thing I hate. Make sense? Losing weight is not fun. We all want to eat the deep friend trans fatty foods we have been turning to our whole life. To just stop eating it, and start eating celery and apples, it's not fun. You get cranky, and upset because your not getting that food we crave. So usually if you hate something, you are going to stop doing it, even if you know it's better in the long run. But for me, I hate eating such bland food, but if I am recording it, and playing around with the editing, and have people waiting for that video, it become fun, and I enjoy eating healthier much more. So now, my journey is like a huge playground!

Sure I still go out and have food I love, but in moderation and like once a month. Usually it is when T.O.M is in town, because my cravings are so hard to control. If I can make sure I don't strangle my husband for no reason, I reward myself with something not on plan, like pizza, or a burger. However, I only did this when I know I can get right back on that horse! Because before, I would have something, and never want to stop. It was bad!

Anyway, I am going to stop rambling.. but I love you all! Hope everyone is doing well, and take care this week!!